Not only has she become a friend, I heart Blarm!

Blarm! – Show #41


23 – Oh Baby

-Baby Thomas Matthew is here.
Huge Congratulations to Mama Missy and Daddy Matt!
I play a message that arrived shortly after he joined us on the outside, sadly my internet connection ate some of it – he was actually born at 6:11pm and weighed 6lbs, 7ounces.

-Birthday eve…
-Throwing balls around…
-stupid girl at work reporting for duty…"you match the wall" and other intelligent statements

Song: "Waste Another Night" by My Little Radio

My Little Radio - My Little Radio - Waste Another Night

Check out Blarm!


-crossing my fingers to adopt a gorgeous puppy
-stupid people on the subway


Song: "Crack Open Your Gorgeous Face", by Semi Precious Weapons

Semi-Precious-Weapons - The-Precious-EP - Crack Open Your Gorgeous Face



22 – Pieces

No, I wasn’t sitting in front of a jet engine…that’s my hard drive….and, I don’t know how to fix it. Seems to be a new audio issue each week…so frustrating.
But I will not be deterred…

Ditched the Semi Precious Weapons show…because I have no friends.


Been busy with the new job and building a humble lil Something Missing site.

Autumn is the man in my life at the moment. Nicole hearts Fall.

Song: “Little Pieces” by Uncle Seth


Song: “Missing Piece” by Meg Allison

Meg Allison - Missing Piece - Missing Piece

A fun new job and a fabulous bathroom makes all the difference.

My ugly old apartment (that I miss)

Jersey Jamcast podcast


21 – Semi Precious Weapons



20 – Truthiness

Same old intro…because I’m not sure I’m ready to record a new one yet. Inspiration eludes me.

A tease about some smoochey action.

I’m unemployed…sort of…just for a weekend this time. I start my new fabulous job tomorrow.

Sick…cough syrup = truth serum of sorts and I tell the whole story of Alex by way of an outline of assoleness…
Summary: Boy gets his cake, eats it, and then pukes it up. Cake gets feelings hurt. Bottom Line: Boy just doesn’t like cake and should have never asked for it, eaten it, and made a big mess. Cake should have never offered itself on a broken platter.

Word of the day – cacophonous – having a harsh or discordant sound.

Song: “Fade Away” by Allison Crowe

Allison Crowe - 6 Songs+ - Fade Away

Message from Rob Usdin of The Jersey Jamcast


19 – A Tree Falls in NJ

A conversation with Matt
A tree falls in suburban NJ, and we discuss it
Divine Intervention at “The House of Tom”
Matt’s dirty south roots and a landscaper’s aesthetic on the Northeast roads
Hurricane Katrina and the state of Louisiana
Matt’s feelings on Alex
The 6 month promise
A father to be mulls the future


Missing Something – 9/11/01


A few weeks after 9/11 I put pen to paper as a sort of self-imposed therapy. This year I decided to read it aloud.



18 – Identity Crisis

This photo – THAT is fake.
That was taken many years ago after the last big break up. Since I didn’t want anyone to see me cry (ever), I took some pictures of myself how I felt one day in seclusion, splashing water on my face, smearing my make-up…this falls under a term I once heard…”rated PG” (pretentious garbage)

So, Jack from The Get Jacked Podcast had some questions that he mentioned on his show…I respond.

Cab Ride
Ground Zero
Song: Love Spirals "Will You Fade"

Love Spirals Downwards - Ardor - Will You Fade



17 – Part 2 with Alex – Cars

Creator vs. consumer
Da Vinci code parallel to law to parallel to the nature of people
Alex totally gets the whole world of podcasting and it seems I may have snagged a future listener
We continue to ponder and hatch this little thought I had, and once again, alex articulates it better than this humble non-prosecuting Podcaster
Car marketing
Lots of car talk
A few more sips of wine and I go even more A.D.D. and make even more sweeping generalizations which I now want to contradict myself on listening back
Roles Royce, Honda, Acura and numerous other car terms I’m not familiar with.
And just when we start to talk GREEN, I change the subject, go figure
Alex continues to stun me with his thoughts on podcasting
Anne Coulter
Scooby Doo
Law School enlightenment
Full Circle
Alex makes an ugly math equation out of me
Mom calls and we’ve babbled ourselves out
No Music This Time

Advance to: 17:00 if your eyes roll back at car chat, but I think Alex made some interesting points here

16 – Still All About Me – Part 1

Alex gives me props and I botch giving proper props to Aegis (again)
Aegis on PMN

Identity crisis / nickname debate

Alex works out his lawyerly twitchings and I show my verbal steamrolling tendencies…

Song: “Home Again”, by Amy MacClain


Alex figures out the destination of my rambling which is that I am without the feeling of a destination

Our thoughts on the mindset of the tri-state area

Song: “Space Rocks Keep Falling On My Head”, by Away With the Fairies

Away With The Fairys - We´ve Been Had - Space Rocks Keep Falling On My Head

Our A.D.D. brings us to Pluto and then back to NY again

And though alex is not gay…I had to cut the conversation here, since we abruptly moved to a new topic and this was a long night of chat.

Stay tuned for part 2…


15 – Incongruous

Please bear with the technical difficulties. I know most other podcasts sound better as they get their sound figured out, somehow I manage to mess this up, too.

Two other things that are going on around me that make me realize how miniscule my problems are.

Mom in the proverbial house. – because who doesn’t love to get email

Song “Another Day”, by MAKAR

Makar - 99 Cent Dreams - Another Day

Song “ Whether I’m Wrong”, by Allison Crowe

Allison Crowe - Live at Wood Hall - Whether I'm Wrong


14 – Popping P’s

My computer has fallen and it can’t get up. I can’t get my headset to work with Audacity any more and so this one was recorded on an iRiver…with many popping p’s and b’s, which is really irritating, I know.

Updates soon on the makeover as it will be in the very near future. If you can see the picture I set in itunes, it was taken after my last massive chop a number of years ago.

Some thoughts on what I’ll be looking for in the less near future.

"Run and Hide" by Barry Price –


13 – Ghosts

I need to re-record another sort of intro…because I DID find a job! And I wish the got the email before I hit record, because Aegis cleared up the pronunciation that I botched
"it’s pronounced "ee-gis", but everybody say "ay-gis"
My Jersey City voicemail ramblings that I so wish I recorded on my new iRiver
Song: "Here Nowhere", by Geoff Smith

Geoff Smith - Geoff Smith and the Tonewheels - Here Nowhere

I chronicle my Jersey City expidition and wind up sounding like "that girl" (again)
The weekend continues and I spend a second night out on the town and wear poopy pants
I realize I’m not really ready to circulate in the general population, especially amongst those who are so good to me
Song: "Sea of a Million Faces", by Allison Crowe

Allison Crowe - Live at Wood Hall - Sea of a Million Faces

and I probably offend everyone who calls Brooklyn home, but I don’t mean it that way, I swear…



The Jersey Toddshow is one of my faves…and he was so kind as to ask me to record a little sumfin to play. Thanks Todd!

Jersey Toddshow #49

12 – Homecoming

I have the house to myself and though I have a ton of music lined up that I’m dying to share…I want to get this out there while I have the time to. I rant a little bit about commuting and get excited about overnight stays closer to NYC. The latest in the Alex saga – he’s pissed me off beyond caring to stay in touch. I move on and suggest you listen to Jersey Todd, he’s great. 9/11 and life in NY trauma. I end on yet another little rant realizing I need a makeover, maybe we can make podcast history and I can be the first Frankenstein podshow makeover.


11 – Picky Eater

My first week at work

PSA – 1800-784-2433





Bloom - All That Is - Falling

Mark Mallman - Between the Devil and Middle C - Tell Me How a Man Gets Close to You

Munk - Severed - Blow Away

I'm still playing with format, it's still a bit sloppy, but I'm figuring out what it is that I'm aiming for…for now at least.


10 – Eureka


I am finally emplolyed! My near 8 month sabbatical has come to an end.

Haunted by more than one ex these days.

The email chain:

Sent: Tuesday, July 25, 2006 8:27 AM
We noticed your resume on Craigslist and would like to speak to you about coming in for an interview. Please call me at your earliest convenience.
*name removed*

Sent: Tuesday, July 25, 2006 12:04 PM
I realize I should probably give you a head’s up since this sort of weirded me out.
This is assuming I even go in for an interview; this is all I know at the moment anyway.
Suffice it to say, I wound up back in NY.
Hope all is well,

Sent: Tue 7/25/2006 12:15PM
Hi there,
Mercury is in retrograde, isn't it? Any number of strange goings on are surrounding me at the moment, so this is only natural. ; ) I was actually just talking *name removed*, our recruiter, a few hours ago about positions that we need to fill (both in my group and beyond.) Which position are you applying for?
*boring stuff removed*
I'm happy you're back in New York, assuming it's where you want to be. *company name removed* would be lucky to have you, but be warned that this place is a mess in upper management. If you're seriously looking for a job I'd be happy to put in a good word for you. I do have a little pull in this place. ; )
Hope all's well,
–*name removed*

Sent: Tue 7/25/2006 12:20PM
The email was from *name removed* and sent a few hours ago. How funny! You should tell her you heard from a friend who you’d highly endorse.
*boring stuff removed*
Being back is an odd thing. It was sudden and not under great circumstance, but in then end I can only rely on the idea that it will all work out of the best. I suppose there are worse places to return to and at least I gave it a try and got to know a great city.

Sent: Tuesday, July 25, 2006 12:39 PM
I'll definitely give *name removed* my endorsement, and I gather now that you aren't even aware what the position is. I know we're hiring for several Production Editor and Editor positions across the company, including a job in my group. I'm guessing it would be a little too wonky to be working directly in my group, though, yes? I should tell her you're perfect for the *specific removed* division.

My dog makes her audio debut

Song: “Magic Carpet”, by New Leaf

9 – All Over the Place

I ponder the idea of an intro after trying my hand with Audacity

pulp + heat = a test of my patience

the Asian parallel

I'm not the only one dreaming
Song: "Love Me Leave Me", by Anji Bee

Clerks 2 with Dad

Beezer's Lebanon Live Blog

Song "Leaving Sodom", by Aegis


8 – California Lovin’

Thanks so much for the amazing encouraging emails, it is overwhelming and far more than I ever expected!

Interview recap and how I might have botched it

Babies on the brain

Song: "Alone", by Adam Schmitt


More on how I prepare for job interviews
Great Answers! Great Quetions!


Point Reyes

more dream dot-connecting

Song: "A Girl Alone", by Hungry Lucy

Hungry Lucy - Before We Stand ... We Crawl - EP - A Girl Alone


7 – A Better Day

Some minor insight into my job search methodology

Yahoo Groups

Studying the basics of Geography

The Engine Show in PA

Song: "Good Day", by Natives of the new Dawn

Natives of the New Dawn - Need Something - Good Day




6 – Dog Poop

The one month mark

D&D play my comment

Song: "Podcast Star", by Jeff Oestreich

I have an interview today


Technology lag so close to singularity

Song: "Not for Me", by Laura Clapp

Laura Clapp - Leaving Nashvegas - Not for Me

5 – For the Birds


Laura Clapp

4 – A Slightly Better Place

A night-terror results in a smashed foot

I tell "A"lex the only way it would ever work between us again would be for him to make the cross-country move back to the East Coast with predictible results

My old room is now my bedroom again.

My first interview yeilds nothing and VH1 plays "Awesomely Bad Break-Up Songs"

I solicit feedback, stories and podsafe music

Grief, and unfair parellels

My domestic dream

Song: "I'd Take You Anyplace", by 100 Year Picnic

100 Year Picnic - As Tall As the Sky - I'd Take You Anyplace


3 – The Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Maria

I start with a message that had been in my voicemail since last July.

The backstory (that I never quite finish) being that I hop from tangent to tangent:
…M rescued the keg, and no one was hurt.

Song: Almost Me, by My Best Fiend

My Best Fiend

I don't go into detail about just how fitting the song is.



Last night's exchange:
A: That was kind of odd. Turns out the lake was the same spot we were supposed to end up originally for rachael's bday
Nicole: I was there
A: Not on the path with the cliff and at the lake. Or were you in the bushes today?
Nicole: Sad not weird
A: That was what I meant. It was weird being there. I wished you were there.
Nicole: Stop
A: I'm sorry.

2 – Another Day

I babble about the context of things linked to a relationship:
Method cleaning products, folding laundry, and how much I miss Whole Foods and Trader Joes. The weather and rain as a theme to much of the major changes in my life over the past year and a half…


Robin Tymm - Footprint - A Little Rain

Song: A Little Rain, by Robin Tymm

Robin Tymm on Facebook


More vague chatter about where things are now as I continue to speak to Mr. A and the frustration that comes along with it.So this podcasting thing is a lot harder than I thought it would be. After some minor editing to cut some annoying background noise that comes along with sitting outside and recording – I found it had this patchwork effect that is even less pleasing than hearing the sound of my own voice. Rather than scrap it altogether, I’m going to put it out ‘as is’ and consider it.


1 – Setback

18 days ago he told me he was "missing something".
13 days ago i boarded a flight to move back into my parent's home.
157 days after i moved to san francisco to be with him.
160 days after i said goodbye to my job in ny.
just about 1 year and 10 months since we got back in touch – after barely knowing one another for a short time in college 10 years ago







Date: Monday, August 23, 2004 12:2 AM
Subject: lordy
Message: hi…i'm late night friendstering, and somehow i
came across you looking for a friend of mine named
a. bizarre. you probably don't remember me,
but i knew you my freshman year at college. i
don't even remember your last name. i am curious to know what you are up to? where has life taken you?
i'm in nyc, plotting an escape most likely to philly.
anyway, take a minute and clue me in!


Laura Clapp - Leaving Nashvegas - Not for Me

Song: Not for Me, by Laura Clapp

Laura Clapp website